i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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