used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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