dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Let's get the cat blown out
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
