I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
