I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
