why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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