Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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