just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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