omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
