My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
