she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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