The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
