If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
