Just mADE A PArabola og urine
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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