"it" just moved
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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