My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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