Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
