i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
PANTIES FOUND
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