you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
