So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
