Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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