his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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