He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
