i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Can Purell be used as lube?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
