you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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