Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
At least make sure they are 18
Why
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize