how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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