i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
