i was born a porn star she said
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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