in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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