I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize