No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
