you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i came on her dog
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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