I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
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