Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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