dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
