halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
