He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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