She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
