So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Shame is for Republicans.
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