singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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