Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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