Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Randomize
