It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
