At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
