pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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