Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
