My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize