I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
