Apparently you make a good broom.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
