are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
