Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
